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by The Notified Team on Jan 8, 2026 9:14:21 PM
Key Facts:- Michael Kaye, Director of Brand Marketing & Communications at Match Group, used OkCupid’s data to shape meaningful, culturally relevant stories.
- This approach allowed OkCupid to stand out in a crowded dating app market without relying on massive budgets.
- In our new podcast episode, hear from Michael and learn practical lessons you can apply to build smarter brand storytelling.
In episode two of Behind the Storyteller, we sat down with Michael Kaye to hear how he helped OkCupid stay relevant in one of today’s most competitive industries.
When Michael joined the company, he faced:
- A crowded market with 1,500+ dating apps
- A legacy brand fighting to stay culturally meaningful
- Big expectations - without big budgets
How did he tackle these challenges? Through creativity, data and courageous storytelling.
If you work in public relations or communications, this conversation is a refreshing look at how smart insights, bold ideas and the right narrative can change everything.
Subscribe to Behind the Storyteller on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or YouTube.
Behind the Storyteller: A Notified Podcast - Episode 2 Transcript (Michael Kaye)
Allen Murphy: Hi, welcome to Behind the Storyteller, a Notified podcast. I'm your host, Allen Murphy, and I'm joined in the studio here with my co-hosts, Caroline Cullinan and Pat O'Rourke. Hey, y'all. How's it going? And this is the podcast where we take professionals from the world of IR and PR or corporate storytellers, and we give them the opportunity to share their story because they maybe don't always get the opportunity to do so. We're going to be doing that by taking a look at our guest, who's going to be our character of today's story. We're going to take a look at some sort of conflict or a struggle or something that needed resolving, whether it's professionally, personally. I frankly don't care too much. And then we're going to wrap it up with a resolution to that conflict. And so, for today's episode, we have Michael Kaye. He's the director of brand marketing and communications at Match Group. Michael, did I do that right? I know, I know, I was practicing earlier.
Michael Kaye: You crushed it.
Allen Murphy: Yes. All right. Cool podcast over. Great to have you. We'll see you later. No. Thank you so much for joining us today. And where are you joining us from?
Michael Kaye: I'm here in New York in downtown.
Allen Murphy: Okay. So, Michael. Yeah. Like I said earlier in the introduction, we want to, we want to get to know you, the character in our story. So where do you want to start with that? Are we going as far back as your birth? Because there are comfy seats we've got all day if we need to.
Michael Kaye: Oh, there's so much to uncover. If I go all the way that far back. We can start wherever we can start when I joined this company. Because that's when I feel like all these, like, brand new challenges that I had had never faced before in my career were presented to me. So, for like a very short background prior to Match Group, I spent about five years on the agency side working with some really big brands, which meant I never really had a problem with budget. I didn't really have a problem of people knowing who my client was, and that was absolutely amazing. And then I got the opportunity to join the team here at OkCupid, first leading PR for the brand in the US. And I had been off dating apps for five years at that point. So, I actually was not even familiar with what OkCupid was. I met my now fiancé on Tinder. He is the first and only date I've ever been on. So, for anyone listening who was knocking dating apps, they literally work. Sometimes they work even better than others. So, yeah. So, I had no idea what OkCupid was, and I remember, I remember asking my cousin, who's a few years younger than me, what she thought about the brand, and she was like, oh, I know OkCupid. That's for that's for our parents. That's for, you know, much older people and I...
Allen Murphy: And I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What year was this? When there was that perception of OkCupid.
Michael Kaye: This had to be 2019 because I joined in in July 2019.
Allen Murphy: Okay, okay. That's making a little bit of sense because I was on like OkCupid and Tinder and stuff, but that was back in like 2012, 2013, 2014, like right around that range.
Michael Kaye: Oh, you were really early. Tinder started in 2012.
Allen Murphy: Yeah. And so, like when, when I was on those apps, the perception that I had was OkCupid was for the people who were my age, and there were other services and other websites. I'm like, oh, that's for like the divorced parents. I don't want to be on those. So, it's interesting how in like a few years after that, that perception flipped, at least from my experience.
Michael Kaye: Yeah. I mean, I remember I heard Tinder for the first time two weeks after I had graduated college, and I was on a trip with my guy friends, and one of them was meeting up with a girl that he met on Tinder. And I thought, wait a minute, you're meeting up with a stranger that you met on an app on your phone? Like it was so foreign to me.
Allen Murphy: Also, everything our parents told us not to. Yeah, when we were growing up. And, like, getting on the internet the first time, it's.
Michael Kaye: I mean, it's the same with Uber or Lyft.
Allen Murphy: Yeah. Yeah. You're getting in their car.
Pat O'Rourke: Yeah. Don't talk to strangers. Don't get in a stranger's car. Cut to now where we're calling up strangers and getting into their cars to take us someplace.
Michael Kaye: And it's just weird. It's kind of fun and exciting to see that change, because now I'll have girlfriends be like, oh, my God, I met the creepiest guy last night, and I was like, what? What did he do? And she's like, he came up to me in a bar.
Caroline Cullinan: Yeah.
Michael Kaye: You know. Yeah. You know, like we've just everything's changed and it's it's really exciting to see, I think being part of the queer community, too, like queer people were really early adopters to online dating. So, it's been normalized for us for such a long time. But, you know, we're not too far from having the first generation that is born to mostly couples who met online. And I think that's that makes my job really cool.
Allen Murphy: Yeah, that's a good point. Like, it's it was something that was introduced to all of us, you know, after adulthood and everything. But yeah, there's going to be kids whose parents met on Tinder, OkCupid, or you know what? I don't even know how many apps are out there now. Like, those are my frames of reference. I'm so behind.
Pat O'Rourke: And it's kind of funny because it used to be, or at least the perception was, you don't want to tell people, oh, I met my boyfriend or girlfriend on a website, a dating app. You know, it felt like a matchmaker. Like going back to the olden times, back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, or when I was a young kid, like this. Now that's just the way that it is. And, you know, Michael mentioned the old creepy that somebody came up and talked to me at a bar. Yeah. And I mean, granted, I'm, I'm the elder statesman of at least our group, and I believe Michael as well. I have no problem with that. I'm still shy as anything, and I don't want to talk to people at a party normally. Yeah, but give me a little liquid courage. And, you know, that's my preferred method of going up and talking to people, because you can only get so much of a sense online. But I still use, you know, some of the, the apps that are out there as part of the queer community. It sometimes skews a little bit differently, but it's such a balance of trying to find the online world and how that like how to navigate that piece of it and how to navigate in real life, because eventually you have to come off of the app and meet the person in real life. Yeah. Yeah, I would hope.
Michael Kaye: Going back to the challenge, one of you brought it up and I'm forgetting who mentioned this, but one of you had mentioned that there's a lot of dating apps out there, and when I first joined OkCupid, I think a couple of challenges bubbled to the surface. First was, okay, here I am in a brand-new industry. I've never worked on dating before, and I'm working at an app that at this point today has been around for over 20 years. So, we're not the new shiny toy on the block, which means we're not going to really be clickbait for an editor. And they're not going to most likely be putting OkCupid into a headline. So, from a PR perspective, that's a really big challenge. Another one, which you all mentioned earlier, is there's a lot of apps out there. This is such a crowded space. I, you know, it's hard to lock down an exact number, but there's multiple reports out there that say there's over 1500 dating apps. So having 1500 competitors is part of the million things that keep me up at night. And I realized, okay, there's a lot going against me here. I'm joining this legacy brand. I'm not at Hinge or Tinder, which are two of the newer, most popular ones. I know so many people. I mean, we met on Tinder and our officiant on our wedding met his fiancée on Hinge. So, I hear those apps all the time. And at this point in, you know, my career, I've been here six years, so I know a ton of OkCupid couples. But when I first joined, I thought, how am I going to break through the noise? How am I, as one person at a legacy brand, going to really make OkCupid culturally relevant again? And when I started to speak to different people at the company, I recognized that our core product differentiator, which is our matching question. So, if you've never been on OkCupid, we have thousands of questions in our app. That's how we connect to people we feel are most compatible. So, when you see another user, you'll get a match percentage that tells you how compatible you are. You can even click it and see where you agree and where you disagree, which I think is a really fun feature. But on the back end, what that gives me in the marketing space is a ton of really rich data, and the amount of data that we have is really unmatched. When you look at any of the other dating apps, like our data storytelling, I think it is top tier. That's probably because I'm the one doing it. But also, because I really do think it's top tier. My first couple of months, I remember thinking, okay, how am I going to tell a story that's going to get OkCupid to be top of mind for Gen Z, for millennials. But it's also a story that our competitors can't have a POV on. Like, I want a story where they won't be able to insert themselves into the conversation. And when I was looking at our data, I thought it was fascinating that we had maybe a handful of questions about climate change and climate change at the time, and very much still is today such a trending topic in the media and on social. And I looked at our questions, and I noticed that people had answered them about 15 million times. That's a huge sample size, and 97% of our data said climate change is real. And more than eight and ten daters were really concerned about climate change. And that was really the first big story I told here at OkCupid. And it was really that where the only dating app in the world that is matching people over a shared passion for the environment and concern over global warming, and it did really well for us. And I'll pause for a second because it's spurred so much more here.
Allen Murphy: Yeah, that's a good point, because I remember, you know, when I was on OkCupid answering all those questions and I didn't really think about the fact that there's probably millions of other people who are answering these exact same questions. What a focus group size. It's such a great way to learn more about the values of the community. And then that can help shape the way in which you're telling the OkCupid story from there. That's a really interesting way to do so.
Michael Kaye: Yeah. And we you know, what's fun is that we can look at the data and slice it in so many different ways, so we can see how people in New York feel compared to people in Boston or Chicago, or US versus Canada versus Israel versus UK. Millennials versus Gen Z, women versus men versus non-binary people, straight versus queer. There’re so many different ways to slice the data. This wound up becoming a really, really big story for us. It led to our first ever dating trend, which was about, you know, two people matching online over a shared belief in climate change. We wound up partnering with Earth Day Initiative, and then later earthday.org, we wound up introducing a brand-new product feature called the Climate Change Advocate Badge that was only live two months ever. And it was during Earth Month in April, two years in a row. We had more than half a million people add it to their profile. And I still see OkCupid being brought into conversations around climate change to this day in 2025, and this story was first told in December 2019.
Allen Murphy: I'm just curious, I don't know if this is me digressing a little bit too much, but when looking at the responses that are coming through and seeing them from, you know, such large, you know, such huge populations across so many different, demographics, were there any trends in responses that you found to be particularly surprising or, anything that was like, like especially noteworthy that you didn't expect?
Michael Kaye: Yeah. I mean, yes, in general, outside of this story, you know, the questions tell us a lot more so that the responses tell us a lot. So, we're not only looking into how people are responding to a question, we look at how that changes over time. And we also look at how important that question is for someone. So, we can tell when we're introducing new questions. We can tell what categories or what topics people are not interested in. If they're skipping it, or if they're ranking it as not important to them. But going back to that, I think the data that always is most interesting to me is how people's views on something change over time.
Pat O'Rourke: Actually, I wanted to ask this because I'm not familiar with it. How often do you ask these questions to the daters, or is it something that they can like, let's say I join, I answer, I filled up the questionnaire, here's what my answers are. And a month from now I see you know what? My thoughts have changed about some of these things. Let me go in and update what that process is like so you can see how those shifts happen. Is it something that's regularly done or is it kind of user driven on when they go back in and update those questions?
Michael Kaye: Yeah. So, the way it works is when you download OkCupid and create an account, you have to answer 15 questions. That's mandatory for us. But there's not a single question on the app that's mandatory. So, you just have to answer 15. We'll show you 15. If there's one where you're like, that makes me uncomfortable or that's not relevant for me, you can skip it and move on. And once you answer those questions, most people go on to answer dozens and dozens more. It's almost gamified. I remember when I first started, I was playing around with our questions. I wound up answering over 100, and I was like, well, I actually got to do some work now. So, it's fun and it's mindless, but you can at all times go back and change your answer. The questions that you answer will live within your profile so you can see what you've answered and change it if needed. But the questions are we're always adding new questions and we're always sunsetting new questions. So, if we had questions about who you are going to vote for in the presidential election, which we tend to stay away from those, but we would sunset it because in June, at the time of us recording this, that doesn't make sense anymore. And we're doing that all the time. So, if you're talking about something with your family or your friends, your coworkers, chances are we started asking it on. OkCupid.
Allen Murphy: That's so cool how quickly you can respond to what's happening in the world and current events. And, I mean, what was a turnaround time for that?
Michael Kaye: If we're talking right now and a question comes to mind and I'm like, we should add that, I could add that within seconds, and then it's live in the app. And then within a day or two we have thousands and thousands of responses.
Pat O'Rourke: I couldn't be I could not be given that power because, you know, what should I eat for dinner on Friday? Just get the responses and be like, all right, I'm getting pizza.
Caroline Cullinan: It almost sounds like polling you know, what the political candidates put out there, but it's just within the dating world. There was something that you said that I loved. I feel like it's definitely different than other dating apps, too, as you said, like the conversations you're having with your friends and family. You can put it out there in question. And I feel like that cuts through the awkwardness of every, like, conversation with the new person. So, you're having these deep conversations without actually having them. You know what the answer is going to be before you ask it,
Allen Murphy: Or at the very least, like, you know, like, oh, this is a safe topic to bring up this is someone we're like, you know, we're aligned enough on this where I can feel comfortable bringing it up rather than being like, and I'm about to ruin the date just by bringing up the single topic. Yeah, that's a really good way. Kind of, alleviate that first date anxiety. Like, not that, like, you know, their life story. Yet. It's, you know, it's still, you know, you have the opportunity to get to know them. But you kind of know what's safe and what's not, to talk about.
Michael Kaye: Again, to your point, we really think of OkCupid as like, this platform that fosters connection and conversation. And there's so many conversations that are just uncomfortable or awkward for people. And if we can make this a little bit easier for you, that's what we see as our main job. If we can help people navigate these tougher conversations, that's amazing. And we have a responsibility to do that as a platform with millions of people. And those questions have been answered in the millions of times. Some people felt comfortable doing it on their phone where they could, like maybe take a minute and think about it, and be a little bit introspective. So, yeah, we take our questions seriously. That's not to say that there are not a ton of fun ones that we do.
Allen Murphy: Yeah, it's kind of like the questions are serving a lot of purposes when you look at it that way because like, yeah. So, you know, on the one hand it's helping you match up with people who are like-minded. But it's also like you were saying, you know, if it's a sensitive topic that you're, you know, you feel a way about it, but you maybe don't know how to express it or, or how to or even how to think about it in some ways, these questions can kind of help someone navigate their own thoughts on their own feelings on it. So, in a way, it's like, yes, it's helping match you with someone, but it's also kind of helping you find a little bit more about yourself and do a better job of articulating who you are.
Michael Kaye: Yeah, yeah. When we're writing questions, I say we, so I write the questions and one thing, there's a couple things to think about. I want to make sure that it's something that's relevant right now to the data in this country. So, we have a localized question then over 30 markets around the world. So, if you're dating in the UK, you're going to see different questions than someone in Israel or someone in India or someone in Japan or Mexico. Our kind of list goes on. So, it has to be culturally relevant. It has to somehow tie back to dating and relationships. It has to be able to be answered by both parties. So as much as I would love to ask, what is your favorite Real Housewives franchise? Usually not just stereotype, but usually in a straight relationship, there's not an overwhelming amount of straight men who are going to be able to answer that.
Allen Murphy: I would skip that one, to be honest. I would skip that if it wasn't obvious.
Michael Kaye: So, there's a lot of different factors to, to think about. And then we then we get even deeper on like how we're wording it because we don't want to be leading with our questions. That's really important to us too. So, there's a lot to think about. And we do take it really seriously. We've gone through exercises of cleaning up questions because as you can imagine, what we were asking in 2004 or 5, 6, it's a completely different climate and culture today. We don't talk the same. We don't think about things the same. So, there's it's a constant refresh.
Allen Murphy: Yeah. Even as you were talking about the amount of questions and the types of questions that are being asked. Now, I'm thinking back to when I was on OkCupid, I'm like, if I were to and Amy, my wife, if you're watching this, I'm not going to reactivate my account. I'm married. But if, you know, let's say I were to find myself single again and, you know, back on OkCupid, if I were to look at those questions that I answered, I'm sure like at least half of them, I would want to update now, like a lot changes in 11 years.
Pat O'Rourke: One would hope. If not, then that's true. That's a different conversation for a different time.
Allen Murphy: Well, I know we're, we're coming up on around the 30-minute mark here. And I want to thank you so much for all these stories. It's been it's been a really, really interesting way of looking at, the industry and how you can really use that, that data, the, the, the survey responses to help shape OkCupid’s story is are there any other sort of final thoughts or things that you'd like to share before we wrap things up today?
Michael Kaye: Yeah, I would say don't shy away from being as creative as possible. I think you don't need this huge budget to make a lot of noise and make an impact. And I think sometimes we get stuck in; I don't have $10 million to do that. I'm lucky if I have $10,000 to do something. Maybe that's a little bit more dramatic than needed, but, you know, I remember, I was really struggling on how to, like, how to catapult OkCupid back into the cultural zeitgeist at the beginning of 2023. And no one knew this at the time, but we were basically building Archer, which is, a dating app for gay men. So, we didn't have a huge marketing budget for OkCupid, and we didn't have product support because we were literally building an app from scratch. And at the time, there were so many conversations around ChatGPT and AI, and I thought, okay, how do I connect OkCupid to ChatGPT? And then I said, okay, it has to drive back to our questions. I write about our questions, but ChatGPT can write them for me. And I made that connection. And OkCupid made this huge splash for being the first dating app to leverage ChatGPT. And that cost me $0. And it was just a fun, creative brainstorm. And I that was I think that's just like one example of, you know, you don't need these big budgets of like a Google or an Instagram or Coca-Cola or whatever the brand is. You can still make a lot of noise. And sometimes it just takes a creative idea and some data and kind of framing in the right way. But any brand of any size can do this.
Caroline Cullinan: Isn't it more fun too when you have zero budget and you're making a big splash? Versus if you have a ton and you don't.
Michael Kaye: So that's way more fun.
Allen Murphy: Michael, I think that's about all the time that we have. Again, thank you so much. This was such a great conversation. About a world that I used to be a bit more familiar with. And now I kind of feel like I've got a better understanding. But thank you for your time. And, for all the listeners or the viewers watching at home. Thank you for watching. And stay tuned for our next episode. Thank you.
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